As Gary Lineker once said, “football is a simple game. 22 men chase a ball for 90 minutes and in the end the Germans win.”
England, no doubt in a more heartbreaking way than anyone else, has often found this to be the case. But that is not to say that the three lions have never tasted any success against Die Mannschaft – we all remember 1966 (or at least our fathers and grandfathers told us about it) after all.
Two of football’s proudest countries will meet again in the Euro 2020 quarterfinals and before the mammoth conflict we thought for 90 minutes that we would drive you through some of the most exciting clashes between the two sides in the post-war times.
An Iconic Image / Evening Standard / Getty Images
Let’s start with the big one.
England’s only major tournament triumph came at the 1966 World Cup at home.
2-2 full time, Geoff Hurst scored two extra time goals to make it 4-2 and claim a World Cup-winning hat-trick against Germany at Wembley.
Did it cross the line? Who cares?
West Germany side that broke English hearts / Express / Getty Images
Just four years later, a quarterfinal at the 1970 World Cup between the two sides went to extra time as well.
Franz Beckenbauer and Uwe Seeler’s goals interrupted previous strikes by England’s Alan Mullery and Martin Peters, before legendary striker Gerd Muller scored an extra-time winner to send Die Mannschaft back to the semi-finals.
Gerd Muller once again gave the final touch to Germany’s battle of England / Getty Images / Getty Images
Two years later, Germany won a two-legged final with England at Euro 1972 in the first stage.
Uli Hoeness, Gunter Netzer and (of course) Muller goals saw Die Mannschaft win 3-1 at Wembley before a 0-0 second stage in Berlin. The Germans would later win the entire tournament – those are the rules according to Lineker.
The Despair of England / Getty Images / Getty Images
This is where it gets teary.
No country fears penalties more than England, and the 1990 World Cup in Italy is probably why.
It looked good when Lineker’s equalizer in the 81st minute made it 1-1 and sent the game to extra time. Another 30 minutes were not enough to solve things, so the semifinals went to penalties.
The three lions’ stint at Italia ’90 ended there, when Germany won 4-3 winners on penalties and went on to the final.
Germany went on to win Euro ’96 / JACQUES DEMARTHON / Getty Images
Now it starts again.
History repeated itself six years later when Germany knocked England out of Euro ’96 in a semi-final penalty shootout.
What was written in the stars was not realized because England, who were at home again, failed to recreate glory 30 years earlier and were dumped out of the European Championships with a 6-5 loss on penalties – with Gareth Southgate famously missing the decisive kick.
ON THIS DAY: 2001 England beat 5-1.
Michael Owen ⚽️ ⚽️ ⚽️ Emile Heskey ⚽️ Steven Gerrard ⚽️ pic.twitter.com/cVFVuAgPPI
– Squawka Football (@Squawka) September 1, 2016
A little refund, anyone?
Just over five years after the horrible night at Wembley, England rioted in Munich.
Carsten Jancker’s sixth opener set the tone for another sad defeat for England, but the away team turned dramatically thanks to goals from Steven Gerrard and Emile Heskey, as well as a hat trick from Michael Owen to seal a fantastic 5-1 victory.
Wayne Rooney and Thomas Muller in action / Clive Mason / Getty Images
And normal order resumes.
The 2010 World Cup Round of 16 match between Germany and England will always be remembered (in England, at least) for the controversial – and blatantly wrong – decision not to award Frank Lampard a goal that would have made it 2-2 in the first half.
We all remember how far across the line it was, I’m sure.
As it turned out, Matthew Uppsala’s goal was useless through goals from Miroslav Klose, Lukas Podolski and a brace from Thomas Muller to break England’s hearts in South Africa.
Just to finish on a high note, let’s look at the collision between the two sides in 2016.
Yes, it was a friendly match, but it’s an exciting victory against Germany on German soil – so what’s not to love? The fact that Toni Kroos and Mario Gomez had put Die Mannschaft up to 2-0 after one hour makes the victory even more impressive.
Harry Kane and Jamie Vardy strikes leveled the score before Eric Dier’s stoppage time gave the Three Lions goal a wonderful comeback victory in Berlin.
